Rising Through the Ranks
by Mother of Dragonborns
Summary: Post-Chapter 700 - Sasuke discovers that being a 20 year-old Genin causes unnecessary problems. Now an S-class ninja has to beat up a bunch of pre-teens in order to advance his rank. [Crackfic] [Canon pairings]


Like all things of any importance, It started on a Tuesday afternoon. More importantly, it started with the slam of a door.

Sasuke cringed as the house settled after being subjected to the abuse of Sakura's monstrous strength. Sasuke did not need to look at the door to know that wooden splinters littered the ground. If this kept up, they were going to need a new door and frame…

He should really talk to her...

Sasuke sighed as he grabbed his keys before setting out to locate his wife. When she was in one of her murderous moods, her chakra signature flared and pinpointing her location was relatively easy.

Sasuke loved that woman more than a shark loves blood.

* * *

><p>When he finally caught up to his wife's chakra signature, Sasuke frowned up at the Jonin Standby Station. Not many of the former oh-so esteemed Konoha 11 had been promoted to Jonin. Which meant Sakura had a limited number of people she could be inside with. In fact, that number was limited to three: Shikamaru, the blonde woman Shikamaru convinced to move to Konoha, and TenTen.<p>

Taking a few steps backwards, Sasuke moved the hair from his eye to reveal the Rinnegan. Which was rather silly now that he thought about it, as he could make out his wife's pink hair through the window. He also observed two distinctive buns periodically bobbing up and down.

'It's just TenTen,' he told himself. Which was much better than his wife going to Ino to bitch about what an insensitive jerk he supposedly was.

As his eyes fell on the door to the Jonin Standby Station, he was cognizant of the fact Sakura knew exactly what she was doing when she came here. he door was closed with a seal only Jonin were taught.

Currently, there was no one attempting to gain access to the building. This proved to be problematic since he could not use his Sharingan to copy the seals. That left scaling the building and knocking on the window as his only option.

Before he could take another step further, Sasuke suddenly found himself unable to move. Sighing discontentedly, he fixed Shikamaru with an annoyed gaze. Did the Nara _really_ think he could hold Sasuke Uchiha?

"Before you break out of this, just hear me out," Shikamaru stated.

"Hrn."

Shikmaru must have taken the grunt for an affirmation since he continued. "You saved the world, there's no denying that. Even so, your actions caused a lot of problems for the village. Disregarding our hierarchy is not only going to be a real pain for not only me, but your family as well. Just take the Chunin Exams and advance your rank so you can become a Jonin," Shikamaru then released his ninjutsu before he was murdered by the only Uchiha not living utero.

"Besides...having all the women use the Jonin Standby Station as a gossip hub is becoming such a drag."

Sometimes Sasuke thought they could just rip out Shikamaru's vocal cord and replace it with a voice box that only said, 'What a pain' and, 'Such a drag." Sasuke doubted anyone would notice the difference.

Once more, Sasuke spared a glance up into the windows of the Jonin Standby Station. His thoughtless actions had already caused Sakura enough problems with Konoha. He would just have to talk to Kakashi and get this all sorted out.

* * *

><p>Making appointments with the Hokage was for lesser mortals. He was Sasuke Uchiha, the man who wanted to watch the world burn, saved it, then deciding the world needed to be burned all over again about five minutes later. After getting his arm blown off by his own stupidity, he finally decided to pretend the whole ordeal never happened, but it still earned him quite the reputation. When he moved down the hallway towards the Hokage's office, shinobi stood aside. There was not much they could do anyway, and most would rather live.<p>

Opening the door to the Hokage's office, Sasuke was surprised to see Kakashi actually in the middle of paperwork. "I'm still a Genin," he announced.

"So you are," came the Hokage's indifferent reply.

"Sign me up for the next Chunin Exams. Since the idiot is also a Genin, he and I can be on a team with someone. Anyone, really."

Kakashi barely looked up from his paperwork. "Naruto is already on a team for the upcoming Chunin Exams. Sorry, Sasuke. Maybe you'll get lucky since Naruto's blatant disregard for the rules cost him a promotion last time."

Sasuke furrowed his brow. Even if he inquired on who Naruto was teamed up with, he doubted that Kakashi would tell him anyway. "I don't understand why Naruto and I never were given a field promotion. Don't you think taking the exams is a little redundant at this point?"

This time, Kakashi set aside his paperwork. Entwining his fingers together, he looked up at his former student. "No one got a field promotion. With Pein destroying Konoha, our resources went towards rebuilding and funding a war. Besides, Sakura never got a field promotion. It wouldn't be fair if just you two got one now, would it?"

When Sasuke didn't reply, Kakashi felt the need to continue.

"Well," Kakashi cleared his throat. "You see, during the last time my predecessor and the Mizukage crossed paths during the Chunin Exams, they engaged in some...epic shit talking. Basically, Tsunade-sama and the Terumi-sama said that the next time Kiri hosted the Chunin Exams, Konoha's shinobi would embarrass Terumi-sama."

"So basically you kept Naruto out of the Chunin Exams to piss off the Mizukage," Sasuke surmised.

Kakasi's eyes crinkled as he gave his former student a smile through his mask. "Exactly."

Sasuke's initial thought was to just forget the village and their stupid games and take Sakura then leave. For good this time. While the prospect was extremely tempting, Sakura's pregnancy threw a proverbial wrench in those plans. They now had a baby to think about, after all.

"While I would prefer to have you and Naruto competing separately, I know better by now than to ban you from it. If you had two squad mates and a willing Jonin-sensei, I would be more than happy to let you compete in the upcoming exams."

"Are there two individuals who need a third squad mate?" Sasuke asked.

From the massive stack of paper sitting on his desk, Kakashi seemingly pulled out a few pieces of paper at random before glancing down at them. "There's your father-in-law."

"I…" Sasuke began before he shut his eyes and imagined himself spending more than an hour with Haruno Kizashi. "No. Absolutely not."

"There is a team who were put up by their Jonin-sensei, but some tragic circumstances led to the Jonin-sensei being removed from active duty while the Genin is currently undergoing intensive psychotherapy."

"Perfect. Put me on that team. Sakura can be Jonin-sensei."

"Are you sure about that? What does Sakura think about being volunteered like this?"

"She'll be fine," Sasuke answered "Now put me on the team."

"Just one thing...How do you feel about dogs?"

* * *

><p>Sakura glared at Sasuke hard enough that Sasuke thought she was trying to immolate him with her mind alone. After a few moments passed, she sighed deeply, as if to reach some sort of inner zen-like state. "If it's a boy…" she began.<p>

Ah, so there it was. The cause of their argument.

"...If it's a boy, we are _not_ naming him Itachi. I'm sorry, Sasuke-kun, but that name carries too many bad memories for the villagers. I can live with Fugaku as a name, but Itachi is just too much."

Sasuke said nothing, but the fact that Sakura was willing to compromise a little told Sasuke that he should try to compromise a little for himself. Which meant he would not press his wife to name their potential daughter Sarada. Yet. "And I still think Miyabi is a dumb name compared to Mikoto. It's better than Chiyo though."

Whoever said that Sasuke Uchiha could not compromise was horribly mistaken. The argument was obviously over because Sakura did not reply. Either that, or she was biding her time until she came up with a scathing response to his comment. He needed to act quickly.

"We have plenty of time to think of a perfect name for our child," Sasuke said as he pulled his wife into an embrace. Moving pink strands of hair aside, he lowered his head until his mouth was positioned close to Sakura's ear. Even before he could playfully bite at her lobe, Sasuke could tell he was already having an effect on her. "I need you to do me a favor. Whatever I ask, you need to say yes to. Alright?"

"Mmmhm…" Sakura purred in reply.

Sasuke studied his wife's expression; her eyes were closed and she was clearly enjoying the moment. Hopefully this would work.

"I need you to be the Jonin-sensei for my upcoming Chunin Exam."

Green eyes shot open.

"WHAT?!"

Sasuke had to immediately dodge his wife's fist, but counted with a wide-eyed stare. When words did not work, a beseeching gaze filled with pathos and sorrow usually did the trick.

One…

Two…

...Five seconds of silence followed before Sakura relented. "Fine," she grumbled darkly. "But you _owe _me, Sasuke!"

Gratefully kissing his wife on the neck, Sasuke murmured, "I know."

* * *

><p>A few notes on the chapter:<p>

I had this idea for a while and have been procrastinating on writing it. However, since the Chunin Arc of Naruto begins tomorrow, I thought I should hurry the hell up in case my idea gets torn apart by the next arc. ~.^

In an OVA, Naruto participated in the Chunin Exams held in Suna. Since he didn't listen to the actual rules, he got disqualified. That is what Kakashi was referring to when he mentioned how Naruto disregarded the rules during his last exam.

As of Naruto the Last, the only two individuals who made the rank of Jonin were Sakura and Shikamaru. Since Chapter 700 TenTen depresses the hell out of me, I thought I would be nice and have her be promoted to Jonin.


End file.
